Sunday, August 01, 2004

Terrorists take long lunches (commentary)

Okay, so I was bored and I tuned into CNN at one o'clock.

The top, breaking story is that US Secretary of Homeland Security Tom Ridge is raising the terror alert threat from Yellow to two o'clock.

You see, the administration has received information that there is an imminent threat to the security of their citizens (particularly those in Washington and in New York). They must therefore work their hardest to get the message to the people as quickly as possible.

The fastest way for them to do this is to hold a press a couple of hours. The administration is confident in their decision because they know that terrorists take two-hour lunch breaks.

Gone are those times, like 1:57, when the whole country was at peace. This is 2:00 now, and we've got to put our guard up!

The country's terror alert level has never been at "afraid", the lowest level, or even at "raised". But today, the threat of attack from terrorists will go up from "increased" to "enhanced". Hopefully we will never have to see the day when it is pushed further to "heightened".

The US administration also reminds its people that if you don't buy your oil from Texans, you're buying it from terrorists.

- RG.

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